If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life it’s that if you don’t control your thoughts, they will control you. From as young as I can remember I have had pervasive fears that weave their way into my thoughts and that can paralyze me momentarily. These usually happen when I’m alone, and especially at night. When I lived in my own apartment in my 20s I bordered on sleep deprivation as a result of these fears. I’d lay awake ruminating, falling asleep only when the sun began to rise, because for me bad thoughts only come in the dark. Fears of harm. Fears of loss. Fears of doubt. Fears of incompetence. Fears of judgment. Fears of failure. Over the years I’ve spent a lot of time learning how to take control of my thoughts. I’ve done this by turning to energy leadership, scripture, and brain research. This makes sense because my hope source is head/holy (you may be a head/heart person, or a heart/holy, we each find our hope in different ways). INspired Leadership has taught me that the stories we tell ourselves can be changed by reframing our thoughts. Scripture reminds me to be careful of my thoughts as they will shape my life. Brain research tells me that all thoughts create neural pathways in my brain, and that the path most traveled is the easiest to traverse.
Yesterday my day was filled with talking about our thoughts, fears, and hope. During the day, I led a workshop on hope, well-being, and engagement for teachers in their first few years of teaching. Our focus was on the importance of keeping a hopeful mindset, self-care, and reducing the risk of vicarious trauma. Last night, I sat with a group of friends and we talked about thoughts, how they impact important decisions we make about work, family, and friendships. We shared things that get stuck on autoplay in our minds and we discussed why it's easier to believe old lies rather than to think new truths. Overall we agreed, that it's what you feed your mind that determines if we are convicted or condemned through our thoughts. As I came home and went to bed, again my mind swimming and sifting through the thoughts of the day I found myself in the same pattern... "Did I talk too much?" "Why do I always overshare?" "Does my story and message come through as raising hope, or does it seem self-serving?" The reframe I came up with was, "I only choose to speak when I feel called to share a message. Oversharing is a judgment I am placing on myself because of the vulnerability that it requires to open up. My life is filtered through a lens of calling upon and spreading hope, And through my vulnerability the door is cracked for others to share their own." During the day a lot of ideas were shared for how to manage your thoughts. Some of my favorites are: 1) Reframing - when a negative thought enters, try to flip the situation to find the opportunity...
2) Put lies in a chokehold - When telling yourself, or hearing a lie, ask clarifying questions to place it in a chokehold.
4) Mindfulness - Research finds that mindfulness practice decreases stress and anxiety. Taking time to clear your mind, relax, and focus on positive neural pathways will help to increase attention to traveling these paths more frequently. 5) Be aware of what you feed your brain - The images, music, words, and energy you surround yourself with influence your thoughts. When you find yourself in a pattern of pervasive thoughts take a moment to analyze what might be feeding that energy. Once the trigger is identified, make all efforts to limit your exposure to that element. To make this even stronger replace the triggering element with something that builds hope instead. Questions to ask yourself:
2 Comments
Ali
4/11/2018 06:31:29 pm
Love this! I used to live by this instinctually... not sure what happens other than having a baby and hormonal and geographical changes... needed this. The scripture, quotes and strength in knowing I’m not the only one needing to hear this! Often times left with your own thoughts and worries can be lonely and freighting, intimidating...
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Katie
4/11/2018 06:52:47 pm
I find so much comfort in knowing that I’m really never alone! The more I talk to people about this topic the more I learn how common it is to be overwhelmed by anxiety, guilt, and fear. I find comfort in knowing I’m not special.
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AuthorHope guides me in all endeavors. In both my professional and personal life I see opportunities to share and spread hope with others so that they too may develop pathways to see great possibilities in their lives. I believe in the power of engaged educators to build significant relationships with young people to encourage, inspire, and build great lives. This blog is a collection of my thoughts on education, hope, connecting, and engaging. Archives
July 2018
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